08 September 2010

Chatterbox

Apparently women use 20,000 words a day, and men only use 7,000 (according to bestseller, Fact-checking ``The Female Brain."). 

I think this video below pretty much proves that my girls have an insatiable need to talk - even if it's about absolutely nothing... every single day... on and on and on. 

Do you feel my pain?


07 September 2010

Thank you...


I just wanted to say a massive "thank you" to everyone for your beautiful comments on yesterday's post.  

It was hard to write down what we experienced, but it was soooooo worth it. The stories some of you shared have really moved me.  Also, thank you to those that have emailed me to share your stories, ask questions about my faith, and also how to cope with the fear of miscarrying.  It has been so good to get in touch with each and every one of you.

Please feel free to email me if any of you want to share your story or ask questions etc.  I love hearing from you!!  You can find my email address here.

I also wanted to thank all of you out there who have been amazing friends and family to those around you who have been through the loss of a child. Even though you might not know what to say or do, the fact that you care means the world to those going through their loss.  It's not about knowing the right words to say - usually less words are best.  It's just about being supportive, caring and being there for them.  People like this, are worth their weight in gold.

Love you guys!!! 


06 September 2010

The ones we never knew

It's rather strange saying goodbye to a stranger, and that’s one of the many surreal moments that comes when you lose a baby through misscarriage. Those that have been there often aren’t quite sure just what they’re supposed to feel or think, as well as the family and friends that surround them.  


After we had our first baby boy, I went through the painful experience of losing my brother (written about here). Soon after that I discovered that we were expecting our second child, and the fact that it was due around the anniversary of my brother’s death made that pregnancy even more special – a life to celebrate and bring joy after having been through such a sad time.

I was rather shocked then, when I miscarried. It was a sad experience (and rather scary going under general aesthetic at the hospital). I kept a little box with mementos in it - the positive pregnancy stick, my maternity booklet and sympathy cards... and life moved on.

I was amazed through this experience to discover how many others around me had also experienced miscarriages – many family members and friends shared with me about their losses.  Some had found it sad, others had been seriously grief stricken by their loss, especially those who had dreams and hopes shattered after previously struggling with infertility.


A few years later we had another beautiful baby boy added to our family. Not feeling that our family was quite complete, we were happy (and surprised – haha) to find I was pregnant again. The pregnancy seemed to go along fine, and once I was past the ‘safe’ pregnancy stage I began to relax. You can then imagine our shock when at 18½ weeks pregnant, no heartbeat could be found during our maternity check up. An ultrasound soon revealed a perfectly formed image of a baby with no beating heart. Although I tried, I could not hold back the sobs.

I assumed that I would be put under general aesthetic and wake up afterwards and go home. Symon left the hospital to collect my things from home, and although I felt all alone, I knew God was with me.


That day turned out to be such a full on day. Because of the stage of the pregnancy, I was told I would have to deliver it naturally. Nothing can prepare you for facing a labour without a happy ending. The labour was painful, but during it, all I could think of was all of those amazing women who have had to give birth to still born children a lot further along than ours. My heart went out to each and every one of them.

After the encouragement of my AMAZING hubby and midwife, we chose to hold and look at this tiny baby that we never got to officially meet. It’s little nose looked just like our eldest boy's nose. It had teeny-tiny toes and fingers. A few weeks later we sprinkled our baby’s ashes where my brother’s ashes were also sprinkled (a local surf beach).  This book helped a lot.


The next few weeks felt like a bit of a daze. I did cry and feel depressed at times. I knew God would turn this situation into something beautiful, so I held onto that promise. I knew that one day we would get to meet these precious little people.  We could literally feel the peace of God surrounding us.

I felt to share my story to encourage those of you that have been through the loss of a child, that there is always hope in every dark situation you endure (including struggling relationships, pain or suffering, depression, loneliness). Keep holding on. Look up to Him, who can bring peace and hope in the midst of the most devastating of circumstances.

Chris Pringle (author of this book) encourages all women who have been through  the loss of a baby to write about them as part of the healing process.  This is what I have done, and encourage you to do too. xox


"I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don't be troubled or afraid."
John 14:27



Article featured here on Delve.

05 September 2010

Happy Father's Day!!


Happy Father's Day to all the amazing Dad's out there... especially to my precious Dad (you know, the mustache cake guy), my lovely Dad-in-law, and the Dad of my children (my awesome husband).  Also to my Heavenly Dad (God), who without Him, none of these other guys would even be here!  

You are all such precious guys who have impacted my life in more ways than one.  

I love you all so much.